Monday, December 15, 2008

Don't Steal Another Man's Jizz. That's Just Wrong.

"Stealing things is a glorious occupation, particularly in the art world."

-- Malcolm Mclaren

So, Coldplay front man and main song writer, Chris Martin has now been accused of plagiarism by guitar-god Joe Satriani. Apparently there are way too many similarities in the melody for Joe Satriani's "If I Could Fly" and Coldplay's "Viva La Vida".  There's an article here with both songs played for comparison. 

My take on this, as a musician myself is this; Coldplay is a little whack. They're akin to the movie Twiins. Radiohead is like Arnold Schwarzenegger's character who was born first; with like all the awesome-sick genes and Coldplay is like Danny DeVito's character who came after and is comprised of all the shit genes. Funny thing is; the aforementioned statement and analogy is not even mine. I totally plagiarized Amado V. That was his statement, in a conversation we had. See? We're ALL thieves. I just thought the irony was too great to not capture and write about here. Only I know Amado's not going to sue me, also.

Plus, I mean, how annoying is Chris Martin? You know the other guys in the band can't stand him because no one even knows who the hell they are! That band might as well be called the Chris Martin Band. CMB! Like DMB, which is another annoying band I cannot fucking stand. Seriously; fuck you if you even remotely like Dave Matthews Band. And fuck you Chris Martin for writing The Scientist and having it remind me of my ex; now I really hate you. 

Let me see you plagiarize this:


  1. great posting ;) I seriously loved the video.. I'm so jizzing right now!! LMAO

  2. MotherFuck Dave Mathews! I just feel compelled to say that anytime he is mentioned.

  3. Fucking awesome, I just read (by following the link to the article...and then another link), that they also lifted the melody from Kraftwerk's "Computer Love" on some piece of shit song of theirs called "Talk".....what a fucking douche Chris Martin is, fucking pretentious cocksucker.